Never Gonna Be That Shining Knight

Posted on Sat Aug 12th, 2023 @ 2:34pm by Kindra Graham & Alden Loxley

Mission: Oh, Give Me a Home on The Range
Location: Ezra - Blue Cloud Ranch
Timeline: 18 November, 2517 - Evening

Kindra had excused herself to make a private call, something that Alden had become used to during the time they'd known each other. From that first meeting through every one since, he'd been consciously aware that they were both a shared resource.

An integral part of Kindra was the fact that her Verse-identity was 'Companion' along with all the fine, fancy and professional trimmings that line of work entailed. He respected that, understood her reasons (or at least believed he did) and yet still harboured some underlying issues with regards to the physical aspects of said role. Their views differed on this matter and likely always would, and Alden had accepted that as part of their relationship. Accepted in respect of Kindra's independent nature and desire rather than agreed with for his own emotions. He could endure, he'd told himself, because his love respected individuality, personal choice and freedoms.

What he couldn't handle, however, was seeing Kindra wounded so badly and constantly put at risk because of him and his personal choices. Being Captain and co-owner (because whatever Ali was up to, she would always own that role alongside him), of a working Firefly brought with it considerable danger, trouble and uncertainty. A soul never knew where, what or who they might be thrown up against. How dangerous each encounter might be was a second major downside. Weapons and forceful personalities were commonplace out here in the Border Planets and - no matter how hard he might wish otherwise - Alden always seemed to find himself mixing with trouble, strife and difficult individuals. Kindra, if she made that choice to remain with him, would be exposed to that on a daily basis.

She was already hurt. By bad people not directly connected to him this time, but Alden knew he could not guarantee her safety. Alison had been dead right about that. Out here, doing what he was bound by conscience to do, there would be trouble, injury and harm. Kindra didn't deserve to be a part of that, and so Alden had taken action to ensure she was better protected. He'd have to drop Ali a wave and tell her she'd been right before he went back out into the maelstrom that had long been his life.

"Everything okay?" Alden asked, as Kindra appeared in view, walking from the kitchen door towards his mother's herb garden. He knew it wasn't, but just seeing how the woman he loved held herself and her bruised body with such a broken grace reminded him that he'd done the right thing.

The wave she'd received from Madrassa, from the priestess of Madrassa herself, had been a shock. In her initial numbness, Kindra sent a brief wave to Kinmont, then in a daze searched the house for Alden. Temporary relief poured over her when she found him in Arca's herb garden. She paused, drinking in the sight of the man she loved among the greenery, so handsome and so compassionate. She hurried forward with the sudden desperate need to hold him and to be held in his comforting embrace, for what might be the last time.

"Oh, Alden. No. Everything is not okay." Kindra flung her arms around him, seeking his solid, physical comfort, and pressed her face against his shoulder. Voice trembling, she said, "I've been summoned to Madrassa. Immediately. The Guild somehow found out about what happened on Three Hills."

Alden winced as Kindra rushed towards him in a manner than spoke of her emotional desperation for things to be okay. They were, as she said, definitely not going to be. Not in the short term anyway. But long-view, emotions in a paper bag under the stairs in the dark, they'd be just fine. She'd find someone else, she'd have family and money around her. She'd be safer, richer and altogether far better placed to enjoy life.

"Careful, careful," he said, voice soft as he cushioned her collision and braced to prevent her ribcage hurting any more than it already did. "You're a way off being all healed up, remember," Alden added, caution colouring his words as he frowned and looked down into those dark brown eyes. Strong arms carefully controlled the strength of their cuddle even as his entire body adjusted to focus on Kindra's safety. He'd known of course, that this call was coming, but cruelty was coming in small waves today, not tsunamis. He still felt dirty, but there was no other way.

"They can do that?" Alden asked, staying away from opinions that might need to lies, and seeking ways around untruths. "And you have to go?"

Did she really have to go? The experience Alison had shared, about the consequences when she defied the Guild, came to mind. Kindra searched Alden's face but saw no hint of worry there. Alison must not have told him about the bounty hunters the Guild sent for her. If Kindra ignored the Guild summons, she'd be putting Alden, Jonas, and all of the crew in danger. "Yes. I must go."

She could hope the Guild only wanted to investigate and protect the safety of other companions. Unlike Alison, Kindra hadn't engaged in espionage against the Alliance. But now she was associated with two known spies. And someone had created Ginny Angel's fake client account in the registry and tampered with Kindra's companion access, to lure Kindra into getting kidnapped. Kinmont warned her it might have been an inside job.

"Alden, this means…" Kindra closed her eyes and rested her damp face against his chest as the immediate implications of the summons sunk in. "The Guild will keep me at Madrassa for several weeks at least, until my ribs are fully healed. I'll be sequestered. No communication in or out."

I know, Alden's brain threw out into the privacy of his own skull. And I have to believe that's a Good Thing. I have to.

He nodded, silently to both Kindra's 'revelations' and wasted another few seconds in quiet contemplation while giving her a close, affectionate cuddle, grip gently warm and very close fitting. It hurt, physically, to feel those tears, to hear that anguish in Kindra's voice, in her very soul, but he had to push through that spiky feeling of guilt. This was for the best. Kindra's best. This had to be done. And, well, it was done, wasn't it. Things were out of his hands now, and under 'The Command of The Guild'.

"I'm sorry, Kindra," Alden said, quietly and sincerely. "I'm really sorry..." He remained quiet for a long moment, simply holding her while her thoughts and emotions wrangled and reeled within. His own were contained now, locked down and considered. His mind had been made up when contact had been made wiith Madrassa, and there was no turning back. Pain was still evident in his tone as he spoke again though, the hardship of the situation not forgotten or taken lightly. One hand stroked her hair, care in every touch, raw emotion in his eyes as he looked into hers. "But you will be safe while you heal. And they won't be holding you prisoner, they'll look after you and they'll protect you. You'll be back out in the Verse before you know it."

Kindra did not share Alden's confidence in the Companion Guild's protective intentions toward her, but neither did she wish to worry him by sharing her own fears and suspicions. She guessed one of the hospital doctors on Three Hills had betrayed her to the Guild, and now there was nothing either she or Alden could do to change her situation. She looked into Alden's deep blue eyes through the fractures of her tears and breaking heart, knowing this was among the last memories of her time with him, and she would treasure every moment in the weeks ahead.

"Back out in the 'Verse..." she repeated, and recalled the ceremony where her mother's ashes were interred in Madrassa's columbarium. It had been comforting to her at the time, and now... Kindra pushed that thought firmly away. She would face the negatives later, and in transit to Madrassa she would look to Kinmont for support. She wiped her eyes with the back of her sleeve and pulled herself together. For now, she needed to stay optimistic for Alden's sake, and bolster his peace of mind. "By then Fortune's Echo could be anywhere."

She stroked his jaw and kissed his lips. Even though Alden had spoken of his wife with her only briefly, she knew he still grieved for Anouk. Leaving him on Pelorum without saying goodbye had hurt him terribly. She could not leave him now without some degree of resolution, no matter how much pain it caused her. "Alden, I love you. I will always love you." Kindra's breath hitched, but she did not allow herself to cry again. She was a Companion - control was the first and last lesson. "But I won't ask you to wait for me."

While Alden was well-aware of Alison's prior situation - they'd dodged some of her old enemies together after all - it never occured to him to worry for Kindra's safety with regards the Guild. Kindra had done nothing wrong. Kindra had been a pawn in someone else's game.

Companions were deeply respected, high-class members of a very exclusive club. A protected, treasured and important resource, highly trained, highly prized and occupying the dizzy heights of respect with a wealth of money and influence behind them. The very fact that said Guild had instantly decided to bring her back into the fold, were sending a fast-burn ship which arrive imminently, spoke volumes of their need to protect their own. There was no doubt in Alden's mind that he was ensuring Kindra's safety, something he unfortunately hadn't been able to personally maintain.

Her tears hurt nonetheless, spiky feelings of guilt wrapped in an overly protective coating of romantic love. Her bruised face, covered in tears was a cruel reminder of his lack of any ability to protect her, and a stark statement to bolster his resolve. Kindra needed to heal, to have time to consider what she truly wanted and to be safer than she would be with him.

"I love you too," he said, words a whisper, but one backed with certainty. Love was hard. Love was sacrifice and difficult decisions. Love was pain and comfort, warmth and safety. Love was knowing when to let someone go. Even if that was only temporary. "And the 'Verse ain't that vast or that evasive that you can't find me again. That we couldn't find each other," Alden reminded her.

I won't ask you to wait for me. That hit him lopsidedly in the emotions.

"Kindra," Alden said, simply, long fingers cradling the perfect curve of her cheekbone. "Right now what matters is that you're safe and you have a chance to heal. This is more of a 'see ya later' than a goodbye." Besides, it wasn't as if he was roaming the Verse looking to hook up with anyone, his own bruised heart and broken soul were heavyweight competition in that regard.

In the days to follow, Kindra might wonder why Alden thought staying with him now wasn't safe, but in this moment Kindra saw only his love for her. It was unlike the Guild – an organization founded on consent - to force compliance from an individual companion, and Kindra still worried she'd be facing censure or possibly an intervention. But Alden's optimism was contagious, and his confidence that this was only a temporary separation gave Kindra faith that all would be well.

When she'd left Alden on Pelorum, Kindra hadn't truly understood what she was feeling, or what she was giving up. Now she knew. Kindra loved Alden no matter what, without condition. Something about the unique combination of his smell, the way he touched her, the way he looked at her with those gorgeous deep blue eyes, his goofy grin when something caught his sense of humor… and so much more. No one before had touched her heart the way he did, and she doubted anyone else ever could.

"See you later," Kindra repeated with a genuine smile that spread across her face. This wasn't goodbye forever. "When I am discharged, I will do everything in my power to find you. But if for some reason I can't find you, I'll go to my family ranch on Persephone, and wait for you there."

"Yup, exactly," confirmed Alden to her repetition. How much later, who knew, but that wasn't important right now. Kindra's smile drove any further shadows of concern from his mind for the moment at least. She was convinced, she was on board and she would be allowed to heal, rest and consider her future in an environment far more conducive to such wondering than this one in which they currently stood. He could figure out the whole mess of situations he'd flirted with over the last few months from rescues to disasters and curious mysteries... Well maybe not in the time it would take for Kindra to heal, but Alden would give it a go. He had a feeling Kinmont would be playing the other side of Kindra's desire to reconnect with this wonky-worlded Firefly pilot, and however that played out, as long as Kindra was safe and happy more than she was sad, Alden would call it a victory.

"Sounds like a good plan to me," he told her, his words fondly and gently spoken. Alden made no promises, and told no overt lies, and he certainly wasn't in the least averse to seeing Kindra again, should the Verse throw them back together. "And hey, you know where my family is now, so you can contact them even if you can't find me," he added, with a bright smile. A pause and another stolen kiss followed by a moment's silence. He wanted to ask how long they had left together today, but also didn't want to break that sense of comfortable happy acceptance Kindra had discovered.

The reminder that Arca would have news of Alden's whereabouts eased the last of Kindra's doubts about finding him again. "And you could contact Margaret. You haven't met her yet, but she's a damn sight easier to talk with than Kinmont."

Now that they had a plan, and the reassurance that this separation was temporary, Kindra's thoughts turned to the now. "I have only a couple hours before the ship arrives. Whoever they send will help me pack, so..." She pulled him gently into an embrace, her hands roaming with comfortable familiarity, and pressed her lips urgently to his. "Let's make the most of the time we have."

"I could," Alden said, with regards Margaret. "We'll make sure we both have their details," he promised, simply. Right now, he really just needed Kindra to be safe, and these tendrils leading them back towards each other in the near future were welcome links to reconnecting, should she still desire such once she'd had time back in the Core to heal and think things through.

"A couple of hours..." the words were surrounded by a soft, resigned sigh. Too short a time, and yet, probably for the best. Long goodbyes sucked more than the underlying sense of difficulty in parting. "Well, I certainly think I can help you pack in that time," he noted with a wry smile. "You don't have so much stuff..."

Her kiss stopped his talking even as Alden felt that familiar wave of guilt that nagged at him ever since Kindra had been injured so roughly. Not enough to stop him returning that shared connection and enjoying said closeness, but definitely enough to ensure his one-armed hug was on the lighter side as his free hand gently cupped Kindra's head. Kissing wouldn't harm her any more than she already was, but that was as far as he was prepared to go, given the seriousness of her wounds versus his own conscience.

Kindra wasn't soon to be forgotten, but Kindra was leaving to be safe, to be healed. She would always be close to his heart, and he took his own sweet time in telling her this without saying a word. But for now, for the next few weeks, Alden needed to think with his head and let his heart go unheard some. Easier thought that enacted, that was for certain.

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